Bodyguard to the Stars 1986, New York, New York Late in October of 1986, Joey Skaggs got a call from an acquaintance who was coordinating a Democratic fund raiser for New York Senatorial candidate Mark Green. Skaggs had recently received a lot of publicity for his Bad Guys Talent Management Agency and his Fat Squad Hoax. So this acquaintance knew he had lots of contacts with scary-looking people. In specific he wanted the help of a moon-lighting cop or a security guard. But the committee didn't have any money to pay. They needed a volunteer. Apparently Paul Newman and Carl Sagan were going to give speeches for the candidate at two different Manhattan locations on Halloween night, and they required a body guard. Skaggs thought this would be an interesting way to spend Halloween, so he offered to do it himself. Dressed in a black suit with mirrored sun glasses (it was night), wearing a fake police badge, and carrying a realistic looking plastic gun from a novelty store in his waistband, he really looked the part. At the first party, which was at a chic Soho gallery, Skaggs and his female undercover partner were introduced to Green and Sagan as their personal security for the evening. Skaggs' partner covered Mark Green while Skaggs covered Carl Sagan and his wife. The crowd never questioned the identity of the body guards. They were just taken in stride as Skaggs covered Sagan's flanks, hands clasped behind his back, eyes scanning the crowd. Skaggs, the bodyguard, had become a foreboding presence to the crowd and at the same time had become invisible to Sagan, who appeared to feel safely protected from whatever dangers he perceived to be lurking at this party. Skaggs went everywhere Sagan and Green went and because of it was privy to much behind-the scenes political scrimmaging. All of which he found very amusing. When the party moved uptown to an elegant townhouse in mid-town, Paul Newman arrived to speak. Skaggs' attention turned to his new charge. Newman had just finished making The Color of Money, a movie about a pool shark and the sequel to The Hustler. As luck would have it, there was a pool table in the townhouse. What a photo-op! Mark Green and Paul Newman playing pool to raise money for the candidate. A journalist yelled, "What a great headline -- 'The Color of Money is Green!'" At some point one of the many journalists thought they recognized the bodyguard. In a loud, somewhat inebriated voice he shouted, "I know you! You're..., you're..." He couldn't quite remember the name. The bodyguard quickly told him to step aside before he had him arrested. That threw him off which was enough to make him doubt himself. Which was enough to keep Skaggs' identity safe for the moment. The evening was a success until, as Sagan was stepping into his limousine to leave, the coordinator who had invited Skaggs, leaned in to the car and said, "Do you know who your bodyguard was this evening? It was Joey Skaggs, the world's greatest hoaxer!" Sagan's jaw dropped wide open. Maybe he was disappointed and maybe he was embarrassed. He had really played his part of the celebrity in need of a bodyguard to the max. And perhaps his self importance had been somewhat trivialized by the experience. Anyway, he need not have worried. Joey Skaggs, if need be, would have taken a bullet. The hoax was revealed in Newsday the next day. When Mark Green's campaign people were called by the paper for a comment, they lied, saying that the bodyguard(s) had not been retained by them at all, but had crashed the parties. This is a small example of the ease with which political operatives will lie when expedient. And how the media can so easily become a conduit for disinformation. © 1997 Joey Skaggs